Does Grief have a Purpose?

Dear ,

If you’re no stranger to grief, then you already know.
There’s no preparing for the way it breaks you open.

And if you haven’t yet experienced it, there’s no real way to fully describe the ache of losing someone you love.
Not just missing them… but holding all this love inside you, with nowhere for it to land.

Grief doesn’t only come when someone passes. Sometimes it shows up after a decision is made, by you or by them, to walk separate paths.
But when it comes through death, it feels different. More final. More quiet. The space left behind is unmistakable.

And although I’ve tried to understand it - to give it shape, meaning, something I can hold on to - I’ve realized it’s not my mind that’s searching. It’s my heart.

Because if I could find a purpose for the pain, maybe it would feel a little less heavy.
Maybe it would feel like the love still has somewhere to go.

What is the purpose of feeling grief?

I’ve come to believe it’s not just about loss.
It’s about remembering. Expanding.
Becoming.

Because every time I’ve walked through deep grief - real, soul-stretching, heart-cracking grief - I’ve emerged different.
Not broken. But re-formed.

More tender.
More faithful.
More present.

And I believe that’s what grief can offer.
We ache because we love.
And that ache can become an invitation.

To deepen.
To soften.
To open to a new kind of connection - one that isn’t limited by space or time.

What if grief isn’t something to get over...
but something sacred we move through?

What if it’s how we expand our capacity to love - and to live - even more fully?

Not everyone grieves the same way. If this doesn’t resonate with you, that’s okay.
But if it does - if you still feel it, whether quietly or loudly - I want you to know:

You’re not lost.
You’re becoming.

Grief might just be the sacred path that brings us back to the heart of what matters most.
Not in the form we once knew.
But in a deeper, quieter, everlasting way.

With love,

Bonnie Sharf
Reinvent Yourself with Bonnie

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